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Triple Crown
Wrap 2006 |
I wasn't stoked when James Wilson first pitched his Triple Crown idea to me. I guess it sounded too much like a cross country race - or worse - one of those adventure races that are all about suffering. I appreciate a good effort but I also like to season my endorphins with more than a pinch of adrenaline. Death marches are not my thing. Last year I missed the TC because I was away at Silver Star with our team and I wouldn't have described my mental state as disappointed. When I got home stories began trickling in about crazy antics, riders losing their way and of course the Shuttlewhores. It began to sound like fun but still not my thing so you can imagine my mixed emotions waking up the day after the CBC Ripper realizing I had volunteered to go along with the Shuttlewhores as Gonzo journalist.
These men are glad but they aren't from Glad. Team Shuttlewhore musters the coolers. Photo ~ Donhok Han
I didn't know what to expect riding with the Whores but I knew pain would be involved no matter who I was riding with. The TC involves riding within striking distance of the top of all three North Shore Mountains and Team Shuttlewhore rode the whole thing last year - without any shuttling. I wasn't packing anything to calculate distance or vertical but I knew it was likely to be around 70 kms with 2300 metres of climbing (45 miles and around 7500 feet). I wasn't too worried about the descending but I rarely put that many hours into my legs anymore. Luckily the Triple Crown is not a race. It's a Poker Rip where you collect cards at seven stations across the North Shore. The best hand is supposed to win but really everyone wins - especially because all our entry fees go straight to the nsmbA. There are no rules in the Triple Crown about how to get from A to B but most riders pedalled the whole thing. A few riders who shuttled a lot of it last year pedalled the whole thing this year. It's that sort of infectious event - sort of like crabs only not as itchy.
Left to Right - Sharon Bader (in green) Tammy Schouw and Ken Bigelow do a huge portion of the work to keep the Rippers Ripping. Thanks to them and all the fantastic volunteers. Photo ~ Cam McRae
There were Whores on Big Bikes - Trevor Hawkins rode his Knolly - medium bikes like Greg Lo (above) on his .243 and a few Whores on what I heard referred to as sissy bikes - like Aaron Bowman who rode a Stumpjumper. Photo ~ Cam McRae
I packed my Dakine pack with my camera, some food and tools and made my way to the Old Buck parking lot on Seymour. Things were well under way when I arrived. Tents were up, bikes were being tweaked and there was an odd assortment of grown men wearing white coveralls. Further inspection revealed these lads to be Team Shuttlewhore. This was their pre and post ride garb and I approved immediately. The thing is I was scared; scared I wouldn't finish, scared I'd be the weakest link and just plain old scared of pain. It's not bad hurting when you have amortized that suffering over a period of training but real suffering - the kind that comes from being unprepared physically - is not my cup of tea. I had been putting in some vertical feet - many of them with James on punishing singletrack climbs - but I didn't know if it would be enough or if I'd be calling a cab from the Cleveland dam.
Exhibit A above - The look on my face makes it clear that I didn't enjoy the Triple Crown at all. I had the perfect bike for the day without a doubt. The SX Trail was the bike of choice on the way up and on the way down. Photo ~ Donhok Han
Fortunately I knew there would be great support riding with Team Shuttlewhore. It turns out there was Pilsner support, Stella support and best of all, delightfully refreshing Russell Lemon Ale support. In fact for most of the Whores the support began even before the first pedal up - but we're getting ahead of ourselves.
nsmb.com does not endorse or recommend riding with this sort of support. Photo ~ Donhok Han
James likes to tweak things just to make sure you don't forget about the event so he made all of us do a lap of the parking lot sans bikes before saddling up and beginning the long climb up to the CBC trailhead. I knew the flat pedals would pay off. Seeing some of the riders ahead of me givin' 'er I couldn't resist getting a tow for 500 metres of the climb just so I could be at the front of the pack for a little while - and to tease the fast people about 'being more non-competitive' than they are. This put me in a position to talk to riders I wouldn't normally see and they made the climb melt away like nothing (thanks Chris!). In fact I was getting cocky and starting to think the whole Triple Crown was going to be a piece of piss. A few Whores were ahead of me but most were behind thanks to the tow but eventually they all drifted in. There was more support, some card collection and I started to sense the rhythm of the day. It was pretty clear that we weren't going to spoil the event by hurrying. Eventually Paul Kim, one of the lead Whores, suggested we start down CBC. The pace again could be described as relaxed and the primary focus was on having a good time. We rolled CBC and then went into Ned's and Bottle Top before crossing the Seymour river at Twin Bridges and up to the Demo Forest. I was surprised to see Lou and Will - our support team - waiting at the top of the climb. I didn't think we'd see them until the water tower. The Lemon Ale support was particularly nice at this point. After we crossed into Lynn Valley we pedalled up until we reached Mountain View Park. I suggested we climb the singletrack to avoid Mountain Highway and the sun beating down on our heads and the Whores were game - not a single grumble.
Look mummy look! I can fly! Rider Mark 'Synchro/Splinky/Ham Chamois' Rowe Photo ~ Dave Tomczyk
When we reached the water tower it was time for some awesome sandwiches, a game of blackjack with James for another card and once again a generous opportunity for a breather. It was at this point that things started to descend into behaviour that at best could be described as juvenile. I was all for it. Jarrett Beatty, the nutbar who thought up Team Shuttlewhore had a proposition for Mark Rowe (the builder of Salvation on Seymour). "Hey Splinky" he said, "twenty bucks if you ride to the 6th switchback with a sandwich where your chamois should be - call it a ham shammy." Mark was game from the get go - even when it was decreed that the sandwich had to be open-faced. Then things really went south. If you have a strong stomach and would like to hear the entire tale click here. If not - good choice. Read on.
Preparing the Ham Chamois. Photo ~ Donhok Han
Eventually everyone plodded to the 6th switchback where Franco greeted us all cheerfully. The task at hand was a 10 second track stand - complete it and you would get a card to fatten your poker hand. Team Shuttlewhore had this task dialled.
A ten second track stand is no sweat when you have a brother to lean on - or even a Whore. Photo ~ Cam McRae
After that it was down the loamy goodness of Executioner all the way to the Baden Powell. From there we meandered through Upper Delbrook in North Van on our way to Cleveland Park - just across the street from the dam of the same name. This station was catered by Tommy's and there was a fine pasta along with ribs. I wasn't feeling all that able to wolf down the good eats though. The tuna salad sandwich that I had chased with Gatorade at the water towers was going down like rusty razor blades. And then it started trying to come up while my stomach began expanding at a rapid pace. In short I was in great climbing shape. I figured I couldn't feel any worse so I sipped on some Russell's and I actually began to feel better. I wasn't about to start chowing down on the pasta but the pressure seemed to ease a little. Once fully supported we coasted the short distance down to Cleveland dam and pedalled across at a leisurely pace, steeling our selves for what would be for me the nastiest climb of the day - the labyrinth that is the British Properties. The sun was beating down on our helmets like a well aimed laser and the gaudy 6 million dollar houses did nothing to ease the pain - nor did pedalling by wealthy residents frolicking in their private lake. After only one wrong turn we finally arrived at Millstream - a trail that undulates above the properties before reaching the lookout on Cypress.
Paul Kim hadn't been on a bike for four weeks before the Triple Crown. He kept hydrated and supported and made it through smiling. Photo ~ Cam McRae
At the lookout there was more support to be had (of course) and then the final pitch of our climb - two long switchbacks of the Cypress Bowl Road - without any shade to be found. I love the unexpected boosts you sometimes get on a really long ride. Maybe it's a lack of oxygen to the pain receptors or a mass die off of brain cells but whatever the source I started to feel better at this point, and I successfully challenged myself to stay in my middle ring for the rest of the climb. Support got into high gear when we arrived at lot 5 on Cypress - at the entrance to Blind Skier. Mary and Kathryn were there already preparing our barbeque and Lou was keeping the support flowing like the Mississippi. By 5:00 most of us had arrived - eight hours after setting off at the bottom of Seymour. We may not have been fast but at least we were slow.
Jarrett Beatty using his melon and earning a bonus card in lot 5 on Cypress. Photo ~ Dave Tomczyk
It was then that I began to realize what attracts the death marchers, marathoners and tri athletes. There is a feeling of elation that comes with finishing this sort of effort that transcends all the pain and struggle. Having two exceptionally entertaining downhills under our belts didn't hurt either - and we still had one to go. There were more antics to be had and of course they centred around Mark, his posterior and sandwich products. They were so successful they earned him the winning hand of the day.
Donhok Han (left) and Kimoon Kim came from Korea for a visit and decided to stay. Donhok works for a Korean bike magazine and Kimoon runs a distributor. Kimoon also rides fast and Donhok takes great photos. Photo ~ Cam McRae
By this point the cutoff at Dizzy Cycles was long gone but Team Shuttlewhore keeps its own hours. It was 7:00 before we began to get our gear together for the descent. I was hoping to go in search of Ed Sullivan - a beautiful line from the old days - but someone informed me that Smoke got lost looking for it last year. If it beat Johnny's trail radar I wasn't about to risk it leading a group of fifteen tired stinky bastards. Mystery Downhill was nothing but joy all the way down - some great hound-doggin' at speed. After that it was into My Friend the Stupid Grouse - which some idiot in West Van has renamed 'The Bell Trail.' It's been nubucked with crushed gravel but it's still great fun and everyone rode surprisingly well despite the effort expended earlier in the day. On the highway we put together a five man break and rode a pace line until Pemberton heights and then dropped right into the party in full swing at The Hurricane Grill.
Once again Ryan Walters (left) and Kevin Tafts blew away the competition in the costume category. The rode all day on big bikes dressed like this (plus helmets) and even took a rip down Air Supply. Photo ~ Dave Tomczyk
Once we arrived I learned that the team of Amber Wilson and Christine Platt were the fastest women through the stations and Alec Black and Ron Edwards were the fastest men. I can't tell you how fast they were because the Triple Crown is not a timed event. We still appreciate a good effort though and both pairs ripped. Amber and Platty lost some bragging rights for rolling down the road instead of riding CBC but this is the Triple Crown and you can do it however you like - even wimp out on a classic descent.
The barbeque at the top of Cypress was a little slice of heaven. Thanks to Mary, Kathryn, Lou and Will for keeping us watered and fed and to all of Team Shuttlewhore for having me along. Photo ~ Cam McRae
The last finishers were Lee Lau and Brian Earle - Team World of Pain. Instead of riding the path of least resistance they took the Sea to Ski approach. They started their ride by dipping their tires in the Ocean near the Second Narrows Bridge. Then the kept climbing past CBC all the way to the lifts on Seymour. After riding the trails down these Mark Weir impersonators again touched the Salt Chuck before riding to the restaurant at the top of Grouse Mountain. They were getting short on time when they hit the Cleveland Park checkpoint and decided to forego another trip down to the Pacific and turned North to the top of Cypress before heading down to the ocean once again and then dragging their sorry baggies to the Hurricane Grill. In the end they covered just about 97 km and over 3000 metres. Check out Lee's blog entry for some great shots and his cool graph of heart rate, distance and elevation.
The Cowboys of Coffee (Jeff Boeda, Steve Fraser and Eron Calderbank aka CC Riders) were out in force and they were indeed fuelled by caffeine. Photo ~ Cam McRae
Despite my resistance I had a fantastic day. It turns out the Triple Crown gets under your skin - and not like a nasty rash in your shorts - more like the something you'll miss your sister's wedding for. It ranks as one of my most memorable riding days ever and I would even call it one of the best. In fact I can't wait to do it next year and you can bet I'm going to convince our entire team to join me. Hope to see you next year. You won't regret it.
We have just launched our Article Discussion Forum today. You don't have to be registered to post in this forum so fire away. If you have a comment about this article (negative or positive - like Frasier Crane - we're listening) or you'd like to see what others had to say click here.
Matt Juhasz (left) and Jon Zammit took ripper king and queen (they were still arguing over who was which last I heard) and won a pair of sweet Specialized bmx bikes. They rode every Ripper this year and performed well every time. Photo ~ Cam McRae
Ten Reasons Team Shuttlewhore rules it.
| 1) They enjoy beer (except Aaron who also rides "girlie xc bikes"). 2) They have their own jerseys, t shirts, coveralls, wife-beaters, g-strings and Prince Alberts 3) They are sponsored by Wedgewood - the folks that make China plates. (Apparently WW isn't über keen on the team name) 4) Some wear lycra, some baggies, some lacy underthings; they don't discriminate. 5) The core Whores ride more than anyone I know. 6) They don't always shuttle. 7) They often night ride. Once they took a ferry to the Sunshine Coast in the early evening, rode all night and came home on the morning ferry. 8) They belong to three marital categories; single, soon to be single or married to patient women who for some reason don't object to a lot of 'time on their own.' 9) Splinky will do anything for a buck. 10) Egos are checked at the trailhead. |
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